The other day, my Dad asked me to help him get a few bags of corn for the chicken from a guy who lives a few hundred meters away. We don’t have a car, so we got our hand- and leg- powered wagon and started walking. Close to our destination, my Dad pointed to a house and started explaining how the guy who lives there is a carpenter. My Dad occasionally takes planks of wood him to process or polish and stuff like that. I said: Great! So what? My Dad went on telling me that this Romanian carpenter in his mid 40s can’t hear or speak. “What?”, I said. “So, this guy runs his own carpentry business alone even though he can’t speak or hear at all?” I had to laugh. I couldn’t believe it.
I kept thinking about all those perfectly healthy but unhappy people I met in my life. People who hate their jobs or the fact that they can’t find a partner and mostly complain about everything. Of course it’s never them that’s the problem. It’s always someone else: “Ah, I didn’t have good teachers”, “I didn’t get good grades so I couldn’t go to study the stuff that I wanted to”, “Ah, my parents didn’t support me”, “All men are idiots!”, “I couldn’t afford to pay for college”…”Therefore I have a shit life”.
Although I don’t know very much about Ilies life at all and only saw a snapshot of it, think about it for a moment: this guy probably had a hard time finding a job. Maybe he didn’t even try. He obviously learned a skill, a skill that will more-or-less guarantee a regular income for his family for as long as he is able to work and, if he’s a tiny bit frugal, he can set enough aside for retirement. Talking of family… He had one! And, more than that, he is working from home and spends most of his time with his wife and child. He takes a break when he wants, plays with his daughter whenever he wants. I am pretty sure that commuting, meetings, deadlines are words that don’t even exist in his vocabulary. In fact, generally, people like him around here don’t even mention stress.
Of course life can be tough here and far from perfect but here are some questions:
Is it worth spending so many years at university getting a degree that very often doesn’t really teach you a skill?
How much of his time do you think he spends in useless meetings?
How much of his time is he ACTUALLY LIVING compared to a corporate jobber?
Is he happier than a corporate jobber?
How did this guy find a partner?
How did he learn his skill?
Is what he is doing more fulfilling for him than what I did for work in the last 8 years or so?
These are just some of the questions that come into my mind…I don’t really know the answer but it makes me think. And it should make you think.
How is it that so many healthy, intelligent people can’t get their lives on track?
I’ll let you answer these questions… I just have one favour to ask of you: whenever you talk to somebody who is young and healthy and blames others for him/her not succeeding in life, please give him a massive slap in the face and tell him about this couple.
It’s all up to you! It’s all about the goals and priorities you set for yourself.
Happiness is not mainstream. It’s not a result of education. It’s not luck.
Happiness is a choice.